Home » It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia » S10E08 — The Gang Goes on Family Fight

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia

Season 10, Episode 8 — The Gang Goes on Family Fight

#1
Oh, man, this is so exciting.

#2
- Is this the green room? - Yeah.

#3
A game show. Can you guys believe we're gonna be on a game show?

#4
- All right, all right, relax. - Awesome!

#5
Guys, the green room of Family Fight...

#6
- I've got goose bumps. - Yeah, all right, calm down.

#7
Don't start acting like an animal, here.

#8
All right, listen, this is Family Fight. This is a nationally televised program.

#9
This is a very big deal for us, okay?

#10
We're talking... What are you doing?

#11
- Are you stealing an ashtray right now? - Yeah.

#12
Why? We have ashtrays, and you don't even smoke.

#13
This is a perfect place for me to lay out my political agenda.

#14
No, no, no. No politics, man.

#15
- What? - Because it's too polarizing, okay?

#16
And don't be misogynistic and please don't be gross, I mean...

#17
Guys, let's, let's be smart about this. Let's be right down the middle.

#18
Right down the middle sounds so boring.

#19
That's not what the audience wants to see.

#20
Thinking I'm gonna do a Jenny McCarthy thing, where I'm, like,

#21
super sexy, but I got a potty mouth.

#22
Uh-uh, no, no, Dee, you are never going to be sexy.

#23
And do not do a potty mouth thing, okay?

#24
We don't want to come across as low-brow animals.

#25
Now, have some veggie platter and have some fruit, okay?

#26
That is brain food.

#27
Mmm-mmm, no way, not me.

#28
Haven't eaten in three days. I don't want to be puffy.

#29
J-Mac's face, it's never puffy.

#30
Yeah, because J-Mac's face is stapled to the back of her head.

#31
Now, eat some food. You look emaciated and sick.

#32
What is that?

#33
Fart noise keychain.

#34
Dennis, what is this enticing bowl of white?

#35
- This? - Yeah.

#36
Charlie, that... That's cottage cheese.

#37
Cottage cheese?

#38
Like... Cheese from some cottage? Whose cottage?

#39
Well, like, what is that, exactly?

#40
How do you not know what it is? Aren't you, like, a cheese guy?

#41
I'm not a cottage guy.

#42
You are gonna make us lose this game.

#43
Here comes the other family.

#44
Hello. You must be the Reynolds family.

#45
I'm Janet, and we're the Barretts.

#46
Oh.

#47
Okay...

#48
Hey, guys!

#49
I'm Lisa. I'm stage manager. Both teams ready?

#50
Let's play Family Fight!

#51
It's time to play Family Fight.

#52
Let's give it up for your host, Grant Anderson!

#53
How you doing, man?

#54
Hey, oh! Hello!

#55
All right!

#56
Thank you for coming out, everybody, and welcome to Family Fight.

#57
I'm your host, Grant Anderson.

#58
Today, we have the Barrett family...

#59
Oh, all right.

#60
...versus the Reynolds family!

#61
And they are here for a whole lot of cash, so let's get it on!

#62
Give me Janet, give me Frank.

#63
Oh... Whoa.

#64
Whoa, I didn't get a good look at you before backstage.

#65
Sha-booyah roll call.

#66
Okay, all right,

#67
we got some-some sparks flying already here.

#68
Now, let's get up here and do this. Come on, Frank, you ready?

#69
- I'm ready. - All right, man.

#70
Top four answers on the board, here.

#71
Name an animal that we eat but doesn't eat us.

#72
- Frank! - Pig!

#73
Show me pig!

#74
All right, oh, Frank's doing a little dance there.

#75
Now, Frank, you want to pass or play?

#76
Pass or play?

#77
- Oh, we... We'll play. - Play, play, play.

#78
All right, so, Frank, you want to tell me a little bit about the family?

#79
Yeah. Well, yeah, you know, uh, Grant?

#80
- Yes, Grant. - I want to... I want to change my answer.

#81
- What? - Wh... What? Why?

#82
I have realized it's, it's not totally accurate,

#83
because I've seen a pig eat a man.

#84
In fact, I've seen many pigs eat many men.

#85
It was a bloodbath.

#86
Well, okay, well, we can't do that.

#87
I'm gonna move on, though, 'cause you're losing me here.

#88
Yeah?

#89
Oh, Grant... A lighthearted barb, if you will.

#90
So, uh, so...

#91
His talk of pigs and man flesh is confusing as it is frustrating.

#92
- Right. - Don't you just want to...

#93
I hear you, I hear you.

#94
You know, you have these people in your life and you just want to...

#95
Yeah. Now, Dennis, uh, why don't you tell me something?

#96
- What do you do? - Me? Oh, well,

#97
I am the proprietor of, uh, one of the most charming pubs

#98
in all of South Philadelphia.

#99
- All right. - Paddy's Pub.

#100
- Paddy's Pub! - Paddy's Pub! Paddy's Pub.

#101
Yeah, but listen, I am so much more, Grant.

#102
Um, I'm kind of a jack-of-all-trades, if you will.

#103
- Okay. - So the question really isn't

#104
"What do I do?"

#105
- It's "What don't I do?" - Wow.

#106
Now, there's a lot of confidence right there.

#107
I like that. I like that, Dennis. All right.

#108
Hey, buddy, can you name an animal that we eat but doesn't eat us?

#109
Oh, easy. A sea urchin.

#110
A sea... A what now?

#111
Sea urchin.

#112
Sea urchin.

#113
- Yeah. - Okay.

#114
Show me sea urchin!

#115
- Ooh, one strike. - Oh.

#116
One strike for the Reynolds here.

#117
Wow, that, uh, that buzzer sounds... It's awfully loud.

#118
- It is loud. - Pierces you right down

#119
to your soul, doesn't it? I don't like it.

#120
- Okay. - I'll be fine, though.

#121
- It's cool. Okay. - All right, thank you.

#122
- Who do we have here? - Hi.

#123
- Hello... Deandra Reynolds. - Yep.

#124
Deandra, help me out,

#125
name an animal that we eat but doesn't eat us.

#126
Well, Grant, I'll tell you what...

#127
- Mmm-hmm? - ...I like to eat cock.

#128
Whoa, no, no, no, no, no.

#129
No, we can't say... Lisa, are we gonna...

#130
See what I did there? It's a little bit of a double entendre type of thing.

#131
I was talking about chicken, but I said "cock."

#132
Yeah, don't say that word. Please, I'm, I'm...

#133
Just, it's a family show, so we're just gonna go with "chicken," okay?

#134
Show me chicken!

#135
There you go.

#136
- Okay. Ronald Reynolds. - Yeah!

#137
- Hello, sir. - Hey!

#138
- How you doing today? - I'm great, Grant.

#139
I'm just really excited to be here with my new family.

#140
- Oh... Your new family? - Yeah.

#141
- Oh, a little bit of background. - Yeah, yeah, yeah.

#142
Uh, actually, just for clarification.

#143
Um, he raised them, but he didn't sire them.

#144
Now, he may have sired him, we're not exactly sure,

#145
but they do live together in squalor.

#146
Yeah, yeah. I actually brought my blood bucket

#147
in case you guys want to run his blood

#148
and see if it all checks out. It'd be good to know.

#149
Yeah, if we want to do, like, a quick DNA sequencing...

#150
- Yeah. - ...at the commercial break,

#151
that actually would clear things up for everybody.

#152
- If we could. - It would set the record straight.

#153
But either way, I was always the odd man out, you know?

#154
I mean, you know. And then Frank, here, adopted me

#155
and now I'm a part of the Reynolds family!

#156
Okay, well...

#157
We don't...

#158
I'm... I'm just... I'm not even gonna try to figure that one out, so...

#159
Okay, here, here's the deal, guys,

#160
from now on, I'm not gonna ask you guys any more questions at all...

#161
- Yes. - ...other than the ones that

#162
keep the game moving.

#163
- Great! Yeah! - All right?

#164
Great!

#165
Show me cow!

#166
Nope, that's me. I say that word.

#167
I say the "show me" part. You just give me the answer.

#168
- Okay, Ronald? - Right, I'm sorry.

#169
- Show me c... - Don't say "show me."

#170
- He just said that. - Don't say it.

#171
- He just said that. - Just say the answer.

#172
Show... Show me is the part I say?

#173
Here's the one thing... There's only one thing

#174
in the whole world at this moment you shouldn't say...

#175
- Mmm-hmm? - "Show me."

#176
So just give me the answer, and then I'll say sh...

#177
You know what, go ahead and do it.

#178
- Just go ahead and do it, then. - Do what?

#179
Mother of... Show me cow!

#180
Cow!

#181
Good answer!

#182
So, sadly we got to stay here. Okay.

#183
- Charlie? - Yeah?

#184
Just need you to name an animal...

#185
- Yeah! - ...that we eat but doesn't eat us.

#186
Doesn't eat us, that's easy.

#187
Dragon!

#188
Charlie, do you eat dragon?

#189
No! I don't eat dragon 'cause, uh, it's, it's not a meal for peasants,

#190
it's a meal for kings, and I'm sort of a common man.

#191
But they don't eat us, they, uh, it's like a misconception.

#192
They actually eat gold and treasure.

#193
That's why they're always sitting on a big pile of it.

#194
- Bad answer. - Bad answer.

#195
- Bad answer. - That's a bad answer.

#196
Okay, show me dragon!

#197
I told you!

#198
Oh, my God!

#199
Well, astonishingly, uh, one person surveyed

#200
gave the answer dragon, so...

#201
What a world!

#202
All right, the Reynolds family has won round one!

#203
There you go, all right.

#204
- Sha-booyah! Sha-booyah! - All right.

#205
But we got a lot more show to go!

#206
It could be anybody's game.

#207
We'll be right back after this with Family Fight!

#208
That's commercial, guys! Back in three.

#209
Yeah! Yeah!

#210
Yeah, that was, uh, that was terrible.

#211
I mean, we're bombing out there.

#212
This... This is exactly what I was trying to avoid, guys.

#213
What are you talking about? We won that round.

#214
Yeah, but you were being lascivious and disgusting.

#215
Dee was making sex jokes that were going over like a lead balloon.

#216
Well, at least we got all of our answers right.

#217
Yeah, that... That's utterly ridiculous.

#218
I mean, how is dragon an answer and sea urchin isn't?

#219
- Everyone knows... - I don't know,

#220
but there's always a weirdo or two in those panels

#221
who's gonna give a stupid answer

#222
and Charlie's always gonna get those, right? So...

#223
- Yeah, I'll get the steal. - Yeah!

#224
Plus, people don't even really eat sea urchin, Dennis.

#225
- Most people don't eat dragons. - Well, dragonflies.

#226
People don't eat dragonflies.

#227
Don't make that noise. I don't like it.

#228
Just relax, would you, Dennis?

#229
Look, if we make asses out of ourselves, they just won't air the episode, okay?

#230
Okay, first of all, you don't know that, and secondly, don't tell me to relax.

#231
All right, don't you start making that noise.

#232
It's not funny when they do it...

#233
Oh, God damn it!

#234
And welcome back to Family Fight.

#235
We got the Reynolds family over here with 100 points.

#236
We got the Barretts over here with zero.

#237
Give me Bobby, give me Dennis!

#238
Here we go!

#239
Okay. Hey, Bobby, all right.

#240
All right, somebody got a little, a little lead in his shoes.

#241
Uh, no.

#242
No. No, my shoes are fine. I assure you.

#243
They're made of the finest Italian leather. The fit is perfect.

#244
Therefore, there would be no room for lead.

#245
All right.

#246
The top four answers are on the board.

#247
We asked 100 people on the street,

#248
"Name something people groom themselves with."

#249
- Dennis! - Laser beams, Grant.

#250
Laser beams?

#251
Yeah, laser beam. It's the only way

#252
to completely obliterate the follicle.

#253
Show me laser beam!

#254
Oh, yeah, yeah.

#255
That noise, it's too loud.

#256
Can we, can we just turn it down a touch?

#257
We cannot, we cannot.

#258
- Bobby, you got an answer? - I got an answer.

#259
- All right. - Hair brush!

#260
Show me hair brush!

#261
Hair brush, that's so obvious. God, that buzzer noise!

#262
Isn't that just irritating as hell?

#263
- We got to think of a steal here, okay? - I got one!

#264
What about, uh, uh, bleaching cream for your facial hair?

#265
- What the hell? - No, no. I, I got it.

#266
- Drakkar Noir. - Mmm, too specific.

#267
You know what it is? I think it's a bride. A bride could be a good answer.

#268
What?

#269
You can't become a groom or get groomed without a bride.

#270
- Oh, no, no... - Right, right.

#271
That's not the kind of grooming they're talking about.

#272
I don't know. Charlie could be right.

#273
- Uh, yeah, I... I got dragon. - No, he's not, he's not right!

#274
Because nobody else is that stupid.

#275
Show me pumice stone!

#276
All right, here we go. Reynolds family for the steal!

#277
No, no, we're not gonna say that.

#278
The comb, a comb!

#279
I'm gonna go with...

#280
Toe knife.

#281
With what now?

#282
With a toe knife 'cause I, I use a, a sharp blade

#283
to dig the scum out of my toenails.

#284
Once in a while, I cut myself, but it pusses up

#285
and in three days, it's good as new.

#286
- Sure. - Toe knife!

#287
Way more information than we needed, but, uh...

#288
Show me toe knife.

#289
Okay, the Barretts win the board!

#290
There you go! All right!

#291
Okay, let's see... See what that last answer was.

#292
Bride!

#293
- Charlie was right. - I knew it.

#294
Do you, do you groom a bride, Lisa?

#295
All right, hey, let's get onto that last round now!

#296
I need some Dee, I need a little bit of Lester!

#297
Come on down!

#298
Okay.

#299
Come on, Dee!

#300
All right.

#301
Okay, here we go, top six answers are on the board.

#302
Name something that people are afraid of.

#303
Oh, oopsie-daisy!

#304
Looks like I, I broke it.

#305
- You think? - Oops.

#306
Can't believe that's... Ain't never see anything like that in my life.

#307
What do you got, hands made of anvils?

#308
You want me to answer that or answer the, this one?

#309
I don't want you to answer either of them, okay?

#310
Yeah, sorry.

#311
Because I don't know who won because you broke the machine.

#312
- That makes sense. - Right? Okay?

#313
- It makes sense, yeah. - Okay, everybody,

#314
we're gonna take a couple seconds.

#315
- We'll be right back after this. - Okay.

#316
Ooh, ooh, ooh!

#317
Start thinking of a steal because if we get this one,

#318
- we win the game. - All right, all right.

#319
- What's the question? - Things people are afraid of.

#320
- That's still the question? - What?

#321
Yeah... How do you not know how the game works by now?

#322
Okay, I'm afraid of game show rules.

#323
- You guys, I know what it is. - Yeah?

#324
- It's failure. - That's too pathetic.

#325
Liberal yahoos taking my guns.

#326
That... That is a political firestorm, Frank. No!

#327
Oh, oh! The Nightman.

#328
All right, guys, these are terrible answers, all right?

#329
Now, normally I would've said

#330
the crust on a creme brulee burning the top of your mouth,

#331
but I'm thinking like a commoner now and I really do think that

#332
the right answer is probably... Clowns.

#333
- That's a good answer. - I know.

#334
I feel like it could be Nightman.

#335
No, I feel like it isn't the Nightman...

#336
- He could be right, dude. - I've got a lot...

#337
Show me dogs!

#338
God !

#339
Okay, Reynolds, you get a chance to steal and win

#340
the whole game right here.

#341
Name something that people are afraid of.

#342
We're gonna go with...

#343
Wait, wait, Frank. You have to say it in the form of a question.

#344
- What is... - No, you don't, you don't...

#345
You don't have to do that 'cause it's not Jeopardy!

#346
- Ah, it's not Jeopardy! - All right?

#347
Say "show me," Frank.

#348
Don't say "show me," Frank. Just say the word.

#349
Just say the word.

#350
- Show me clowns! - All right.

#351
Show me clowns!

#352
Yeah! We did it! We did it!

#353
And the Reynolds win the game!

#354
The Reynolds win the game!

#355
Sha-booyah, sha-booyah, sha-booyah, you lose!

#356
Sha-booyah, sha-booyah, sha-booyah, you lose!

#357
All right, okay. So, anyway...

#358
...let's take a look at the last one, everybody.

#359
"Nightman."

#360
Don't know what that is. Just don't know what it is.

#361
- What is happening? - Pretty strange answers today!

#362
All right, man. Uh, we're gonna come right back

#363
and play some Fast Money. We'll see you right after these messages.

#364
How the hell was "Nightman" an answer?

#365
- Right. - Dude, I think I'm remembering

#366
what happened. I took this survey.

#367
I got interviewed at a mall

#368
and I thought it was, like, a government thing.

#369
- Oh... - Okay, all right.

#370
That makes more sense.

#371
That's actually the only thing that makes sense.

#372
Right? Okay. So I should play Fast Money,

#373
because I'm gonna know all the answers.

#374
No, no, no, you're only gonna know your answers.

#375
And that's only gonna get us one point for every question.

#376
We need to get all the top answers to win Fast Money.

#377
Right, totally, totally. And then we spin the wheel.

#378
You're definitely not playing, 'cause you can't understand a thing

#379
- that's happening. - I'll play.

#380
No, you won't play, because you've been nothing

#381
but gross and foul and polarizing the entire time.

#382
You're embarrassing me in front of the whole nation.

#383
- Dee... - Mmm.

#384
- ...you and I are gonna play. - Yeah?

#385
- Mmm-hmm. - Can I do my fart keychain?

#386
Absolutely goddamn not.

#387
Okay, now go get something to eat, you look terrible.

#388
No, no, no, no, no, no. I'm very hungry, but I'm not gonna blow it now.

#389
- This is my close-up. - God, don't be a dumb,

#390
- hungry bitch the entire time. - Guys, we're back.

#391
Okay, all right, you're going first, Dee, you're going first.

#392
- Come on, Dee, go, Dee! - Here we go.

#393
All right, we are back with Fast Money, here with Dee Reynolds.

#394
But first, there's somebody who wants to say something to you.

#395
Hey, Reynolds family!

#396
Win $20,000 and bring home the money for Paddy's Pub!

#397
Yeah, all right.

#398
I'm done dancing like a monkey.

#399
Give me my five bucks, Charlie.

#400
Ha, ha, wow!

#401
That was a rough video, right there.

#402
- That dude is hard on the eyes. - Yeah.

#403
- He's all burned up. - We couldn't get anybody else?

#404
No.

#405
Okay, you ready, Dee?

#406
Oh, you better believe it.

#407
- But, uh... - Mmm-hmm?

#408
...first, hold on a... Hold on a second, there's, um...

#409
Yeah?

#410
- There's, uh... - You okay?

#411
- Ooh! Yeah. - You all right?

#412
Uh, yes... There's a...

#413
Just a quick bit I wanted to, uh...

#414
Oof.

#415
Oh, whoops-a-daisy.

#416
That's about as low-brow as it gets.

#417
Yeah, Dennis isn't gonna like that.

#418
It's pretty funny, though.

#419
Okay, new plan.

#420
All right.

#421
So we're back here with, uh, Fast Money here.

#422
Uh, now we got Frank doing it,

#423
'cause people just be faintin' up in here, so, okay,

#424
give me 30 seconds on the clock.

#425
Name something you thought existed when you were a child.

#426
Santa Claus.

#427
Name something you might find in a bathtub.

#428
Soap!

#429
Name something people add sugar to.

#430
Coffee.

#431
A thing you associate with Charlie Chaplin.

#432
Little mustache.

#433
Name a foreign country whose films are popular in America.

#434
France.

#435
Damn!

#436
You did it, man!

#437
- That was great! - Yeah, man!

#438
Oh, oh, that was so good!

#439
That was so good, Frank!

#440
Hey, you ready?

#441
- Yeah, I'm ready. - Frank did great.

#442
- Frank? - Yeah, uh, Dee passed out.

#443
She... Of course she did. She's so embarrassing.

#444
Right.

#445
All right, here we go, everybody. We're gonna bring Dennis out right now.

#446
Here he is, Dennis Reynolds.

#447
Here we go.

#448
Yeah, Dennis.

#449
All right.

#450
Okay.

#451
Now, Dennis...

#452
Frank got the number one answer for every single question,

#453
so you only need five points

#454
- to win the game. Okay? - Okay, I can do it.

#455
Now, Grant, listen, I know I gave some bad answers before...

#456
- Yes. - ...but I understand the game

#457
perfectly now, and, uh, that does not represent me.

#458
- Okay, I like that. - Okay? So I'm ready to give good answers.

#459
- I like that. - That does represent me.

#460
All right, that sounds good, that sounds good.

#461
If you repeat any of Frank's answers,

#462
you're gonna hear this sound...

#463
- ...and then... - Thought we were done with the buzzer.

#464
- Oh, only if you repeat an answer. - Even in this round?

#465
- Yes, even in this round. Yep. - Mmm-hmm.

#466
If you don't know an answer, you can say "pass"

#467
and we'll just move on to the next question.

#468
- Okay. Yes, yes. - All right, are you ready?

#469
Thirty seconds on the clock.

#470
Name something you thought existed when you were a child.

#471
Santa Claus.

#472
Oh, God... Uh, pass.

#473
Name something you might find in a bathtub.

#474
Uh, soap.

#475
Argh! God, I really hate that buzzer.

#476
- Can we not do that? - Clock's ticking, clock's ticking.

#477
Okay, uh, pass.

#478
Name something people add sugar to.

#479
God... Coffee.

#480
Oh, God...

#481
Nope, we gotta... We need an answer.

#482
Yeah, no, no, okay, no, then pass, then pass, 'cause...

#483
A thing you associate with Charlie Chaplin.

#484
Mmm... Pass.

#485
Okay, name a foreign country whose films are popular in America.

#486
France.

#487
Oh, God, no, no!

#488
- Already said that. - Oh, God, France.

#489
France. France. France.

#490
That's still not the answer.

#491
Little mustache. Soap, soap, France.

#492
Say something else!

#493
It won't stop!

#494
He said that already. Don't say "France."

#495
Give up.

#496
All right, I have never seen a more embarrassing display

#497
in my entire career.

#498
Oh, please don't air this.

#499
Okay? Please don't... Don't air this... You won't air this, right?

#500
Oh, no, no, we definitely air it. We always air it.

#501
No matter what, we air it. That's how we do it, my friend.

#502
Good night, everybody!

#503
Thanks for joining us here on Family Fight!

#504
Take care.

#505
Why'd they have to air that part?

#506
That was the end part.

#507
- The best part. - Yeah, they air the whole show.

#508
This doesn't represent me, though.

#509
This doesn't represent me.

#510
That's not who I am.

#511
So just don't air it.

#512
It's the buzzer that was... That just doesn't represent me.

#513
So just don't air it!

« Prev Page 1 of 1 Next » Back to Search