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It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#53
cause the balls have rolled down to this end.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#54
No! You got to snap your back up and lift.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#55
I'm jerking my back up!

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#56
- What do you want from me? - Hey, what's the ruckus?

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#57
I'm trying to conduct important business back there.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#58
We finished with the tile, and we're trying to move the pool table back.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#59
All right, all right, all right. Have you done the urinal?

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#60
Because the urinal, you flush it, and it sprays all over the place.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#61
- Yeah, I know. I know. - Look, bro.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#62
You got to stop bossing us around, okay?

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#63
I mean, look at Charlie. You're breaking his spirit.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#64
Look at me. I'm broken, dude. Look, I'm...

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#65
You guys need a father figure. And I'm trying to be that father figure,

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#66
and someday you're gonna thank me for it.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#67
And that's all there is to it. Trust me. Trust me on that one.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#68
You're gonna thank me for it. (door closes)

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#69
I don't want a father figure.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#70
BOTH: #Oh, baby, you You got what I need

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#71
#But you say he's just a friend But you say he's just a friend

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#72
#Oh, baby, you#

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#73
Come down just a little bit. He's not hitting it that high, you know?

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#74
- #Oh, baby, you# - Now you split the difference.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#75
- You got to split the difference. - Yeah, split the difference.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#76
What the hell is this?

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#77
Living the dream, bro. Living the dream.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#78
I thought you two were out looking for careers or something.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#79
We are, man. We're just getting a little bit of assistance

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#80
to help us out over the hump.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#81
And this unemployment thing is so great,

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#82
because we've made really big plans.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#83
- I'm gonna be a veterinarian. - Yeah.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#84
And I am gonna move to New York, and I'm gonna be on Broadway.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#85
What? It's 1:00 in the afternoon, and you're piss-ass drunk.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#86
Well, you know, it's a slow process, man. It takes a little time.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#87
- But we trust the system. - Is that a new watch, dude?

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#88
- It is. It's awesome. - Oh, and I got a Jesus chain.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#89
- It's good. Look at it. - All right, look, guys.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#90
We want you to come back to the bar, okay?

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#91
- Why in the hell would we do that? - You're not even listening to me.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#92
- Did you see my Jesus chain? - I'm busting my ass in that bar,

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#93
and you guys are sitting on the stoop getting drunk all day long?

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#94
(mock crying) What, this again? What, this again?

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#95
- I have to work! - Cry for me. Cry for me.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#96
I don't know how to take advantage of government programs.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#97
Unemployment runs out, all right?

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#98
And once it does, you guys are gonna be back out on your asses.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#99
Once it runs out, we're gonna go on welfare, dude.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare
#100
- Welfare? - Mmm-hmm.

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